When I Smashed My Finger Loading Bricks

Blessed be your discretion, and blessed be you, who have kept me this day from bloodguilt and from working salvation with my own hand! 1 Samuel 25:33

I like to think of myself as even-tempered and levelheaded. I don’t get stressed often and I don’t find that I’m easily upset. In fact, I’m quite delightful to be around. . . much of the time. Like most people though, when stressed, the worst in me comes out. Yesterday was one of those days. Left over from a previous project, we’ve had several hundred bricks, weighing several thousand pounds, sitting by our garage for the last year. We’ve just never gotten around to getting rid of them – until yesterday.

I had other projects that I intended to get to, but first, those bricks needed to be loaded onto pallets and then onto a trailer. I thought it may take an hour, or maybe two at the most. As the four-hour mark approached though, and as my other projects lay untouched, I grew frustrated. When I smashed my finger between a pallet and the trailer, I yelled a bad word. Not once. Not twice. But three times. I didn’t yell at my wife – who was kind enough to help me with the brick loading – but still, it’s no fun to be around someone who’s screaming in frustration. After, I was not proud of my outburst, and I found myself wishing I’d not let my emotions control my actions. I’d acted like a big-boy baby, and I regretted it.

Our emotional response often isn’t the healthy or right response. That’s the lesson of today’s passage. In the story, David reached out to a man named Nabal for assistance. David had previously helped and protected Nabal’s men and he expected some courtesy in return. In return though, Nabal disparaged David, humiliating his men. Deeply offended, David prepared to go to literal war with Nabal over the insult. Abigail, Nabal’s wife, intervened though, defusing the situation. In response, David cooled down and thanked Abigail for saving him from his own anger. David realized that in his emotional outburst, he almost acted terribly himself.

My emotional response often isn’t helpful and when I let my emotions control my behavior, I usually behave badly. It’s not that all my emotions are wrong – they’re just emotions, and as such, they’re a terrible guide to my words and actions. If I am willing to own my feelings, I find that I can choose to be frustrated, without lashing out at those around me. I do not need to live enslaved to my emotions. Even when hurt or stressed, if I choose, I can still live how God wants me to live.