Mismatched in Our Friendships

Ahab king of Israel said to Jehoshaphat king of Judah, “Will you go with me to Ramoth-gilead?” He answered him, “I am as you are, my people as your people. We will be with you in the war.” 2 Chronicles 18:3

Years ago, I planned to get together with some buddies from college. Having gone to a conservative Christian college for two years with them, our relationship hadn’t involved much alcohol. I had transferred away though and subsequently became far more interested in the typical college lifestyle. When we got together for a long weekend then, it was clear that their expectation of our time together was far different than mine. They were ready for a weekend of Christian guys getting together, maybe doing a Bible study together on Saturday morning. I was at a point in my life where I thought a guy’s weekend required a lot of alcohol. It quickly became apparent that our time together was going to be a disappointment to everyone involved. Our lives had simply gone two very different directions. We were mismatched and just didn’t belong together.

This is similar to what happened in today’s passage. In the story, King Jehoshaphat of Judah, formed an alliance when his son married the daughter of King Ahab of Israel. Jehoshaphat followed God, but Ahab’s reign was defined by idol worship. Ahab needed Jehoshaphat’s military strength though, so Ahab enticed Jehoshaphat into this treaty. It quickly became clear that they were mismatched when Jehoshaphat insisted they go to God, asking his will about an upcoming military campaign. Ahab, I think, rolled his eyes, while Jehoshaphat truly sought God’s will for their future. They were terribly mismatched, with their lives pointed in completely opposite directions. Jehoshaphat followed God, while Ahab did whatever he wanted. In the end, Ahab drug Jehoshaphat down, causing him to suffer painful consequences for his poor judgement.

There’s a powerful lesson for us here. If we desire that our lives go in a certain direction, it’s imperative that we surround ourselves with others who desire the same. Living in faith and recovery is hard work, which we were meant to do in community with others who desire to also live in faith and recovery. Whether we like it or not, we’re influenced by those with whom we surround ourselves. If we surround ourselves with those who’re also seeking faith and recovery, we’ll find those things. If however, we attach ourselves to those with no interest in faith and recovery, like Jehoshaphat, we’ll suffer for our poor judgement.