New Addiction

And he said, “At this season, about this time next year, you shall embrace a son.” And she said, “No, my lord, O man of God; do not lie to your servant.” But the woman conceived, and she bore a son about that time the following spring, as Elisha had said to her. 2 Kings 4:16

I knew I was going to struggle when my kids moved off to college. I could see, long before they left, that I found a lot of my identity in being their dad. And I was right. I did struggle. Fortunately, my wife and I love each other and appreciate our time together and so, we’ve come to enjoy our empty nest phase. Something unexpected happened over the last year though. Both of our kids graduated college and moved back to the area . . . temporarily. As they’ve been applying to graduate school, they’ve been in our home a lot. I’ve once again, grown accustomed to having them around and I now find myself dreading going through the process of becoming an empty nester once again.

In any addiction, something that was never meant to be our god becomes our god as we elevate it to being the most important thing in our lives. Inevitably, that thing – or person – is not The God, and so, it simply can’t bear the weight we put on it. I’m not suggesting that a relationship with one’s children is as destructive as a drug addiction, I’m simply pointing out that even good things – like the parent/child relationship – can be elevated to an unhealthy status.

I’ve got to wonder if this is what happened in today’s passage. In the story, a wealthy woman provided free room and board for the prophet Elisha whenever he traveled through her town. Wanting to do something nice for this woman – who had been barren up to this point – Elisha orchestrated a miracle and God gave her a son. A couple of years later however, that child suddenly died. I’d wager that before conceiving, the woman had prayed fervently for a child and believed that she would be happy if she became a parent. The problem, of course, is that with her happiness dependent on another person, she discovered that all people eventually fail.

As a Christian, I am to find my joy, purpose, and meaning in God. In my drug addiction, I tried to find life in drugs, which was obviously a poor plan. In recovery, I’m still tempted to seek life in things other than God, and even good things can become unhealthy when I put them at the center of my life. If I try to find my meaning in a relationship with a person, I’ll eventually learn that any person will eventually fail, not because their bad, but because they’re not God. Daily then, the challenge is to turn to God, finding my meaning in him. Only then, can I enjoy healthy relationships with those closest to me.