And when Ahab heard those words, he tore his clothes and put sackcloth on his flesh and fasted and lay in sackcloth and went about dejectedly. 1 Kings 21:27
When I was young, I viewed God as a cosmic fun-killer who had a lot of rules, most of them designed to keep me away from all the pleasurable things in life. Then, I thought I discovered a loophole, as I realized that God had to forgive me no matter what I’d done. I could enjoy all life had to offer, and I could get away with it. God, it seemed, was a giant sucker, a cosmic dupe, who allowed me to do as I pleased on Saturday and then forgave me on Sunday, as long as I confessed and repented. I believed God was all-knowing and so, I knew that he foreknew of my plan to con him into forgiving me. And then, despite knowing ahead of time, when I repented, he still forgave me. Like I said . . . a giant sucker.
This is what I think of when I read today’s passage. If you’ve been following, you’ll realize I already addressed this passage three days ago, writing about how God is moved by our repentance. And that should have been that, but I just kept coming back to the passage in my head, as if it bothered me. It bothers me, I think, because it seems to me that Ahab’s repentance was a bit insincere. His whole life, Ahab chased foreign Gods, leading his people to do likewise. He knew what he was supposed to do, but he did what he wanted. Then, when the prophet Elijah condemned the king, he suddenly took up fasting and mourning, as if he’d truly changed his ways. God saw his behavior and interpreted it as repentance, withholding his judgment from Ahab. The story bothers me because in it, I find God too lenient, as if Ahab is taking advantage of God’s mercy
The irony of this is not lost on me. I do recognize that I’ve exploited the same loophole for my own good. And I should be grateful for this loophole, recognizing that it’s not a loophole at all, but rather, it’s simply God’s nature. Thankfully, God desires that we should all come to repentance and fortunately, he is quick to forgive when we do. What I interpret as God being a sucker is simply God being God – slow to anger and quick to forgive – which is a good thing for me, because it is, of course, me who has so often needed this mercy.