At the command of the LORD they camped, and at the command of the LORD they set out. Numbers 9:23
Have you ever looked at someone else’s life and knew that they’d be better off if you made their decisions for them? Every choice they make is worse than the last as they perpetually self-destruct. What they should do is obvious. What they actually do is idiotic. They’re simply bad decision makers and it’s clear that their lives would be better off if someone else made all their choices for them.
I’ve been that person. I’ve recognized that my life was an utter disaster, and I knew that I was making terrible decisions. I knew what was right and part of me wanted that. In the moment of every decision though, I wanted that which was wrong more. My behavior was ruled not by the healthy, but by what I desired right now. In my misery, I begged God to simply take over my decision making. Take the wheel God. I knew my life would be far better off if he drove and so, I asked him to do so. To this, God said no.
Why? Why can’t I just hand over my free will to God, allowing him to assume control of my life? He wants me to follow him, and I know I’d be better off for it. My life problem is that even though my way is disaster, I still want it. So why can’t I just give God permission to make me a robot for him?
Today’s passage sheds some light on the answer. In it, Moses explained how God instructed his people and they followed. As the Israelites traveled through the wilderness, seeking the promised land, God led them with a cloud. When the cloud rested over the tabernacle, the people stayed put. When the cloud moved, they moved. God spoke and they obeyed. Everything God did was to teach them to follow him. God could have made them robots, but he didn’t. God desired that his people listen to him, and so he gave them free will. He desired that they exercise that free will to follow him, but free will also meant they could go their own way.
This is where I find myself every day. I’m driving the car while God provides directions. He knows what’s best for me, but continually, I struggle with wanting to go my own way. Living by faith then, means that I must daily abandon my way, looking to God, listening to his will for my life. I may want God to take the wheel, but he doesn’t. Instead, he asks that I drive, daily following his directions.